Can Anyone Tell Me What a Fairy is Supposed to Look Like?

On Friday my magazine launched a new serial piece on its blog. The stories we write are related to the themes we’re accepting submissions for. Our current theme is Fairies, Elves, & Dragons. Here’s the problem. I don’t read or write fantasy. No particular reason. I don’t dislike the genre. I just don’t gravitate toward it.

In preparation for this blog post, I spent some time on the Internet trying to figure out how to describe the fairy in this story. I didn’t get that deep into my research before my four-year-old announced she wasn’t going to take a nap, but from what I was able to find, there really wasn’t anything that listed physical characteristics of fairies. That’s a problem. I can look at pictures of Tinker Bell all day long but it won’t translate into writing.

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My mind doesn’t work that way. So, I did what every dedicated, hard-working writer would do in my situation. I gave up.

I decided that my fairy wears a tank top, yoga pants, and sneakers. She also doesn’t wear wings.

She does have fairy dust. It comes out of her pores, leaving a mess everywhere. And while this didn’t make it into Friday’s blog, I can tell you that she and her husband have had enough of the constant mess caused by their fairy dust. They’ve been through three cuums —

 

— a magical device used to clean up fairy dust – in the last month. The expense of replacing these cuums is starting to take a financial toll on them.

After that, I decided that my elf does whatever an elf does during the day —

— but at night – he’s an aspiring performer. Comedy, television commercials, Broadway. Wherever he can get a gig. And then there’s the dragon. She’s a hot mess, suffering from acid reflux and motion sickness. She’s also in therapy. Don’t ask me why. I haven’t figured that out yet.

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I had a lot of fun writing this blog but there’s one think I’d really like to know. What’s a fairy supposed to look like? Someone, please tell me.

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7 thoughts on “Can Anyone Tell Me What a Fairy is Supposed to Look Like?

  1. Fairies look like us, except a whole lot better. But they’re way nastier (if that’s possible).

    They will come into your house and steal your baby and leave one of their own in its place. Such babies are called changelings. They’re trouble.

    If you meet a fairy, be polite. Be very polite. Just don’t ever eat fairy food. Don’t even go into a fairy’s house. You won’t get out for years (if ever), and when you do everyone you know will be dead.

    Fairies are not our friends.

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