Dear Diary,

Isn’t it nice when Momma let’s me on the computer?  Lately she’s been hogging it to work on her (cough, cough) novel.  I don’t know why.  Nobody’s gonna read it.  You know why that is, Diary?  Because I’m not the star of it.

Sigh.

Anyway, Momma’s pipe dreams aren’t the point. So I’ll just get right to it.  I got in trouble on Twitter.  Yes that’s right, Twitter.  I tweet!

Recently a dog (Can you believe that?  I have a dog following me.  Moron!) sent me an email.  The email was one line and read, “Somebody’s saying nasty things about you.”  There was a link after it too.  Well, I didn’t open the link because I didn’t want too.  But I did send a reply to that person.  My reply went something like this:

“I’m a cat.  I don’t care.”  That was it.  Simple and to the point.

A couple of days later the dog sent a reply, “Pardon me?”  (No!  I will not!)

So I responded again and wrote, “I said I’m a cat.  I don’t care if someone is saying nasty things about me.  And no, I won’t open that link because it probably just leads to a porn site run by somebody with way too much time on his hands.”

That’s when the dog got all huffy.  I got this really long email about how the doggy didn’t send that email and also that the doggy’s Twitter account got hacked and somebody else sent that email and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

So, for the third and final time I responded and wrote:

I’m cat……I don’t care!

And you know what Diary? I really don’t care.  It’s not at all an exaggeration of the truth.

This is Gwennie signing off!