Diary of a Cranky Cat – In which I apply for a blogging position

Dear Diary,

This afternoon I embarked on my first major career move since Sham Farce, editor of Pilcrow & Dagger Sunday Newspaper, had the audacity to refuse to hire me.  This time,  I think I found my niche.  Have you heard of Katzenworld? According to their website: they are all about cats.  Such nice people!  They blog about cats, cat toys, cat situations and sometimes, actual cats blog for their website.  When I found that out I jumped on the opportunity to introduce them to me.  Why? Because I’m special.

So today, I sent them an email, politely requesting that they employ my services.  Momma read my pitch to them and assured me that it was a letter only I could get away with writing.  That’s the nicest thing she’s said to me all day. Now I feel bad about coughing up a hairball on her purse. (No Grandma, it wasn’t the Dooney and Bourkes. So quit stroking out!)

Anyway, for your reading pleasure here is the email I sent to the humans of Katzenworld. As you might have noticed, the pictures I sent did not show up where they were supposed to. Rude! They’re on page 4, just in case you’re worried about missing out on another opportunity to admire me.

Gwennie1 Gwennie2 Gwennie3 Gwennie4

 

It occurred to Momma, after I sent the first email, that I probably should have listed her as a designated human.  Ha! Designated my butt!  One time, when she was still single, she got so drunk, she stopped and asked the couch for directions to the bathroom. If I hadn’t been there, she would have puked inside of her closet instead of the human litter box. Designated.  What a joke!

Gwennie5

That’s all for now, Diary.  I have to get going. I’m sure that the humans of Katzenworld will be knocking on my door any time now.

This is Gwennie – Signing Off!

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