The Epic Parenting Fail & a Little Fun with My Business Partner

It’s a secret every parent knows: kids are resilient until they aren’t. A little over two weeks ago my three year old decided she was going to climb out of one our patio chairs. In doing so, she fell, pulling the chair on top of her and that’s when I heard it.  The cry. The mother of all cries. The cry that tells you she isn’t just scared or being a drama queen; she’s hurt.  My husband I noticed she was favoring her hand. Once we got her to calm down, my husband had her open and close her hand and wiggle her fingers – all of which she was able to do. We noticed two of her fingers looked bruised and swollen so my husband used one of those craft popsicle sticks to make a splint and we gave her Ibuprofen for the pain. But as the days went by, the swelling didn’t go down very much and one of her fingertips was very purple.

Yesterday, I decided it was time to see a doctor. With the imminent arrival of our newest addition, I wanted to give birth knowing that my second child was okay. The pediatrician was very concerned about her fingers so he sent us to the hospital for x-rays. That’s where everything stopped being fun.  My daughter started screaming the second we took her into the x-ray room.

To make matters worse the x-ray technician wouldn’t let me in with her.

X-ray technician: Is there any chance you could be pregnant?

Me (looking down at my extremely round stomach.) No. I’m just fat.

The technician paused as though she sensed sarcasm in my tone of voice. I can’t imagine why.

Me: I’m almost 39 weeks pregnant.

X-ray tech: You can’t come in here. I’ll have to find someone else to help.

Twenty minutes and two additional staff members later, we completed the x-rays. My daughter cried all the way back to the waiting room, begging to go home.

The doctor came in a short while later and the second he entered the room, my daughter started screaming.  Somehow through all of her screams I heard one of many words no parent ever wants to hear: fracture.

The little stinker fractured the tip of her middle finger. Since it had already been two weeks and she wasn’t in any pain, the doctor chose to make a more comfortable splint for her finger and have us – meaning my husband – come back in two weeks for a follow up.

Now the real excitement begins. Three technicians are in the room preparing to take on my three year old and her screaming so they can splint her finger. One of the technicians is holding out four different colors of tape for my daughter to choose from while my daughter screams and yells, begging to go to the car. Then, out of nowhere, my daughter turns to the technician and screams, “I want the orange tape!”

After that, things went smoothly. She graciously allowed them to splint her finger and wrap it without any more screaming. I made a follow-up appointment and we left.

When we arrived home, my husband greeted us at the door and my daughter looked at him with a smile on her face and said, “Took pictures of my hand. I got orange finger.”

Oh sure! He gets the adorable version while I’m stuck with total, hysterical nightmare.

Anyway, at least we got her looked at and she’s going to be okay.

That being said, I’ve been scurrying to get stuff done for my business before I go into labor. In case you don’t know, I co-own and operate a magazine called Pilcrow & Dagger. For each issue, I put together a video preview that we use to promote both our magazine as well as the writers. Yesterday evening I finished the video preview for the July issue. Submissions for this deadline don’t close until May 31st so there are few blanks that still need to be filled in. But I wanted to send my business partner what I had so she could go ahead and give it her nod of approval. Let’s just say, I had some fun with those “blanks.”

My partner enjoyed it so much, she told me to go ahead and post it as a promotional tool to get more submissions for the July issue. So, I thought, well, if she enjoyed watching it, maybe you guys will too.

So here’s the video. And don’t worry, no cows were injured during the making of it.

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One thought on “The Epic Parenting Fail & a Little Fun with My Business Partner

  1. A mother knows the sound of a real hurt. My husband has no clue. He can’t tell the difference and doesn’t think I can either. Men. Anyway, I’m sorry she got hurt. My youngest just decided to slide down in the bathtub and was having the time of her life until she reached the end of the tub and landed with a Barbie foot bruise on her butt. Of course, it wouldn’t have happened if she would have listened to me in the first place and not used our tub as a water slide.

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