Useless Humans

This is the conclusion to the “Phoning PETA,” series. Dear Diary, I wrote you a poem. It’s called, Ten Things I Hate About Telephones. I hate telephones because they are ugly. I hate telephones because they go in the Daikini child’s mouth. I hate them because all they do is sit there and stare at people and cats. (Honestly! They […]

Door Knockers

This blog is a continuation of Gwennie’s diary entry, Phoning Peta. “I need a towel! I need a towel!” The four-year-old screamed at me while I rinsed her hair. “You’re holding it in your hand.” I hated pointing out the obvious, but she was holding a towel in her hand. She used it to dry her eyes and a for […]

Phoning PETA

Dear Diary, Everything has been awful! First, Momma disappeared for almost two days. She took the Daikini child with her which was nice but I keep telling her, “If you’re going to take the Daikini child away, you have to remember to leave her wherever it is you go.”  Did she do that? No! She brought the little prevert back! […]