Doogie Howser: The Junior Fellow

I write letters to Ellen DeGeneres. No particular reason. Just because I can.

Dear Ellen,

Yesterday, I took the baby back to the doctor to get her foot looked at. If you don’t remember from last week, I had A LOT of questions for this pediatric orthopedist. Is she allowed to walk on her foot? How do you corral a two-year-old? Why the fuck are you sending us to Atlanta for her scoliosis treatments? 

Here’s the deal.

 

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There are two pediatric orthopedic surgeons that work 20 minutes from where I live. One of the surgeons is no longer seeing new patients because he’s getting ready to retire in two months. The other surgeon doesn’t have the skillset necessary to do the required procedure.

 

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“However,” the doctor said, “in August we’re getting a junior fellow who has an interest in this type of procedure. You should call back in August for a consult and see if he’ll take your daughter on as a patient.”

A junior fellow?

 

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I don’t want to sound like a jerk, Ellen. I’m sure it took a lot of hard work and dedication to become a junior fellow. As a parent, I have to ask myself, Do I want a newbie doctor working on my child? No. Of course not. I want a renowned physician for my child. The dilemma is, a doctor doesn’t become renowned without first being a newbie.

Not having to drive three hours one way for her procedures would be awesome and a whole lot easier for my family. BUT, we’d also be giving up her surgeon in Atlanta. And her surgeon in Atlanta is the chief of orthopaedics. A renowned doctor. Or close enough.

My husband and I have basically decided what we’re going to do, but I always love knowing your thoughts, Ellen. Below is a quiz with a very appropriate title. Just in case you can’t read the title, it says, “This Stupid Plugin Won’t Let Me Change the Color of This Font.” I also can’t change the size of the font in the survey so if you use reading glasses, make sure you’re wearing them.

 This Stupid Plugin Won't Let Me Change the Color of This Font!!!!

Which doctor should A. Marie choose?

Sincerely, 

A. Marie

Thanks for shopping Snark, Sass, & Sarcasm! I’ll see you next time.