I write letters to Ellen DeGeneres. Why? Because I Can!
Here is a list of things I never imagined I’d ever say. I have my kids to thank for these.
- Don’t comb your hair with your chicken nuggets
- Don’t body slam the cat
- Don’t water the plants with your milk
- Don’t put the cat’s tail in your mouth
- Don’t color with your cereal
- Don’t sit on the cat
- Don’t play with mommy’s tampons
- Your cereal bowl is not a hat
- Whose poop is that?
- Where’s your diaper?
Ellen, I never imagined being a parent would be so challenging and so humorous.