2. (Regarding #1) Yes. It’s personal. Next time get a permission slip before being born.
3. I don’t care what spell check, Webster, Google or any other dictionary says. It’s not Pervert. It’s Prevert. P-R-E-V-E-R-T.
4. I don’t care what grandma or anyone else says. Little Missy is ugly and doesn’t look anything like me.
5. I’m not stupid. I’m very smart. I know the world doesn’t revolve around me. But it should.
6. I love my momma….most of the time. But not always. Take last Saturday for example, I didn’t love her then and I might not love her this Saturday either. Just depends.
7. The Little Thing belongs to Momma. Keep your preverted hands off of him. I don’t like him but Momma does, so I guard him because that’s my job.
8. I have minions. They’re called puff balls. Puff is pronounced P-O-O-F. Never say P-U-F-F. That pronunciation is both obscene and absurd.
9. My full name is Gwendolynn Anne Marie Stefani Collins Silver. You may call me Gwennie or Her Royal Highness.
10. I AM the Supervisory Cat-In-Charge. AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT!!!!