Dear Baby: There’s No Crying In Baseball

Dear Baby, It’s the middle of the night and I understand you’re upset. But, why are you yelling at me? I didn’t pee in your diaper. Calm down! There’s no crying in baseball. You just ask that Forrest Gump fellow. First he’ll give you some mumbo jumbo about life and chocolates. Then, he’ll tell you there’s no crying in baseball. […]

Dear Baby: I wrote this song for you….

It is inspired by your unwillingness to burp and fascination of ceiling fans.  It also kept me awake and amused during your middle of the night feedings. Every time I burp you I sing you this song. I don’t want to burp. I don’t want to burp. I just want to stare. I want to stare, stare, stare At Grandma’s ceiling […]

Dear Baby: Will You be a Herpetologist?

Dear Baby, I look at you and watch you stare.  It’s like you’re analyzing and investigating your environment, trying to absorb as much data as you can so that when you start talking your first word will also be your first question:  Why? I wonder who you’ll become as you grow and what things will have your interest.  Will you […]

Dear Baby: Here are 5 Rules for You to Follow When You’re Older

Daddy and I feel strongly that you should be able to express yourself. However, for your own protection (and our sanity) we will invoke the following rules. 1. You and your friends may go through a grunge phase. That’s perfectly acceptable as long you understand that you may very well be the only “grungy” kid who takes a bath every […]

If Baby Could Talk – Part 2

Uh oh!  Uh oh!  My arms got out.  My arms got out! Momma!  Momma, my arms got out!  My arms are loose!  They’re loose! Momma!  Momma, my arms got out of the swaddle! Momma!  Momma, help! My arms!  They won’t stop moving!  They won’t stop moving! MOMMA! MOMMA, HELP! MY ARMS WON’T STOP MOVING! I CAN’T MAKE THEM STOP!  I […]

If Baby Could Talk

Somethings wrong.  Somethings not right.  Did it rain?  Did my crib flood?  Am I laying in a puddle?  Oh no.  I’m wet.  I’m wet again.  I don’t like to be wet. It’s dark.  It’s dark in my room.  I’m alone.  I’m alone in the dark, in my room and I’m wet. Momma.  Momma, I’m wet. Momma, I’m wet and I’m […]

Dear Baby – Let’s talk about teamwork

Dear Baby, It’s the middle of the night and this never-ending battle between you and your Bink, for which I have to referee, is starting to annoy Momma.  I think it’s time for the two of you to start working together as a team. Baby:  the Bink only works if you keep it in your mouth.  Bink:  Baby is only three […]