A. Marie Silver

A. Marie Silver

The 100th Day of School

I write letters to Ellen DeGeneres. No particular reason. Just because I can.  

Dear Ellen,


Last week my kids celebrated their 100th day of school. You know what that means? That means there are less than 80 days left of school before summer.


The 100th day of school fell on a Tuesday which was the first day of the week after the MLK holiday. So naturally, we completely forgot about it until Monday night, right around the time the kids would normally be getting changed into their pajamas. And the only reason we remembered it is because the 7-year-old’s teacher sent out a text to the class reminding the parents that the kids needed to bring in a plastic, ziplock bag with 100 items from around the house. Read. That. Again.
100 items. My son’s teacher wanted us to send our children into school with a plastic bag filled with 100 items. I’m sure you can imagine my reaction.
But if 100 items is what she wanted, 100 items is what she would get. Far be it from me to stand in an educator’s way. Here is what I sent my child to school with.
  • One Jenga block
  • One toy train
  • One train track piece
  • A collection of misfit puzzle pieces
  • A small jar of dried Play-Doh
  • One Lego Spiderman
  • An old toothbrush
  • A sock with a hole in the toe
  • via GIPHY


  • A can of 5-year-old beans
  • 1/2 banana
  • A diaper
  • A tampon


  • An applesauce pouch
  • A fig bar
  • 43 broken crayons
  • 42 random pictures downloaded off the internet
  • 1 large trash bag to put everything in

By the time we got my son loaded up for his 100 day of school celebration, I was ready for bed. As far as I know the day went fine. Not much else to report. I tell you what, Ellen, all of these school celebrations wear me out. I hope there isn’t anything else soon. I’m saving all of my energy for Dr. Seuss week.


That’s all for now, Ellen. Until next time!
A. Marie Silver
Thanks for shopping Snark, Sass, & Sarcasm! I’ll see you next time.
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A. Marie Smith

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