Me:  What book do you want to review?

Gwennie:  I want to review The Day the Dogs Took School Over, but I’m a little confused.

Me:  Why?

Gwennie:  I thought Aunt Sheri wrote this book.

Me:  She did.

Gwennie:  But on the cover it says it’s by Anne Michaels.

Me:  Aunt Sheri is Anne Michaels.

Gwennie:  Aunt Sheri’s name is Anne Michaels?

Me:  No, Anne Michaels is her pen name.

Gwennie:  Pen Name?  Who the hell would name a pen?

Me:  No. No. No. It has nothing to do with a pen.  It’s like an alias that writers sometimes use.

Gwennie:  An alias?  Did she kill someone?

Me:  No.

Gwennie:  Are you sure?

Me:  Yes.

Gwennie:  ‘Cause on T.V. they use an alias when they’ve killed someone.

Me:  She didn’t kill anyone.  She just wrote a book.

Gwennie:  Are you sure?

Me:  Yes!

Gwennie:  Well, all right.  As long as your sure.

(Pause)

Gwennie:  Momma?

Me:  Yes.

Gwennie:  Why are there dogs on the cover?

Me:  The book is about dogs.

(Pause)

Me:  Why are you scrunching your face?

Gwennie:  I think I figured out why Aunt Sheri uses an alias.  I wouldn’t want to be affiliated with those dirty, flee bags either.

Me:  Somehow I don’t think she shares your opinion about those “flee bags”.

Gwennie:  Obviously!  She wrote a book about them.

Me:  Gwennie!

Gwennie:  What?!

Me:  Just review the book, will ya?

Gwennie:  I’m getting there!  I’m getting there!  Geez, Momma!  You can’t rush genius.

Me:  Oh for the love of Cheerios.

Gwennie:  Or dog biscuits, in this case.